Daniel's TV Blog

I was really disappointed in how Survivor 13.3 started out last night. The first thing they did was integrate the teams. Why bother segregating them at all if it was only for two episodes. I expected four episodes, give or take. It was really lame to pull back after only two episodes. On the plus said they've created the hottest team ever: Adam, Brad (pictured), J.P. and Nate. I think there are some women on that team too, but I didn't really notice them. Adam's kind of a dick and he's got tats, but he's still hot. I keep waiting to fashion designer Brad to come out. He's got the gay accent, come on!

So in my post a couple weeks back I listed Ugly Betty as one of the shows I was not watching. This was mostly because it was on the same time slot at Earl and Survivor and I only have two TiVos. I actually have one TiVo and a fake DISH network TiVo-type device. So last night I was over at my friend Larry's who has a party every Thursday night and we watched the premier episode and it was fabulous. Betty is great and her boss is hot! The show is so over-the-top campy. It is going to be a huge hit amoung gay people. If you are gay, you need to watch this show. There are also two gay characters on the show, although they haven't specifically called them out as gay yet. One is the assisstant to the evil rival to Betty's boss played by Vanessa Williams. The other is her nephew, although he's only 12, he is obviously gay. The sets are wonderfully outrageous as well.

The show has two O.C. alumns, Caleb who died last season, and the evil Dean who was having an affair with Taylor. Ugly Betty is based on a very popular Telenovela. I love that they kept her Latina. You can watch the full episode online right now: http://dynamic.abc.go.com/streaming/landing

Season 2 of the current incarnation of Doctor Who starts tonight on the SciFi Channel. This aired on the BBC earlier this year. At the end of Season 1, the doctor died and was reborn in a new body, which happens from time to time when they need a new actor. I loved the previous doctor but the new one is really cute. Tonight they embark on a new futurist adventure called "New Earth" where it looks like they encounter the evil Casandra who tried to kill them when the Earth died in season 1.

I've been watching LOST season 2 on DVD. Disk one is all about the hatch and resolving the cliffhanger from season one. I could pin-point the exact moment I stopped liking Jack. It was when he would not drop the gun when Locke was being held at gunpoint by Desmond. OK, so here's the deal: you break into someone's house with dynamite and then point your gun at the resident. How does this make you the good guy? Also, he's so sure that the button does nothing even though Desmond is so paranoid that he runs away and there's obviously something going on with the magnetism. Jack has lost me. He's going to have to do some great things this season to win back my love and trust. The other strange thing was Libby showing up as Lizzy, Michael's ex-wife's lawyer in the custody battle. Is this the same person? Why don't they remember each other? Why hasn't anyone on the internet pointed this out?

Disk two is all about the tailies. I got really emotional when I re-watched the reunions of Sun & Jin and Bernard & Rose. The episode that chronicled the "Other 48 Days" was really well done. Poor Shannon. I miss her.

SPOILER: I've read that Boone is back for at lease one episode in either flashbacks or hallucinations.

Heroes starts tonight on NBC after Deal or No Deal, which I can't believe is still so popular. It's about ordinary people all over the world suddenly developing super powers after some sort of solar eclipse. It looks really good, but I don't expect it to make it to a second season. I do like the idea that one of the character is names Hiro. I wonder if there is going to be a super villain?

The Epic 10th season of South Park starts on 10/4. The same night at LOST, BTW. Starting Sunday they are running the 10 most influential episodes of South Park one each night running up to the season premier. Of course on Sunday they will be airing Trapped in the Closet, the episode that got Tom Cruise bent out of shape by implying he was gay and exposing Scientology for the crack-pot fake religion that it. Incidentally, the Scientology mission in Redmond near Microsoft recently went out of business and if now a pawn shop. I love it. Anyway, here is the full list:

9/24 - Trapped in the Closet.
9/25 - Cartman Gets and Anal Probe - the first episode!
9/26 - It Hits the Fan - They say "shit" on TV!
9/27 - Best Friends Forever - Kenny is in a persistive vegetative state. This aired originally two days before Terry Shivo died.
9/28 - Timmy 2000 - Timmy has ADD
9/29 - Cartman's Mom is Still a Dirty Slut - the second season premier which solved nothing from the cliffhanger
9/30 - South Park is Gay - Crab People, Crab People. Taste like crab, talk like people.
10/1 - The Passion of the Jew - Mel Gibson goes insane, years before it actually happened.
10/2 - Red Hot Catholic Love - What are we going to do about all these boys talking about priests abusing them?
10/3 - The Return of Chef - Chef joins the Super Adventurers Club.

Set your TiVos!

OK, so now we have to wait for January for the conclusion to both these storylines. I like both, but Atlantis had a much better finale. I love SG1's quest story, especially how they kept picking up additions to their quest. But if Inara wasn't supposed to use her power, why was she able to use her strength to open the grate? Was it a real dragon, or a hologram, or Mecha-Streisand? Great story even if we predicted almost everything before it happened. When will Mitchell take his shirt off all ready? Over on Atlantis they had a grear story of loss and moving on. Everyone returned to Earth and started a new life. When Atlantis was threatened again, I thought they jumped to quickly into disobeying orders. It would have been more believable to work within the system. Do standing order from Gen. MacGyver still count if he is presumed dead? Not likely. And the whole trans-galactic gate system is a little fishy to me. The gates work on a coordinate system. Two symbols for each dimension in space and the origin symbol. The symbols on both the Milkey Way and Pegasus gate systems are specific to that galaxy. If they were outside galaxy, how they they have coordinates in three dimensions? I think that was a serious goof-up. And I'm soooooooo tired of replicators. They were lame in season three of SG1. Do we really need another machine species whose goal is to exterminate mankind? I'm glad the ancients got their come-up-ance. Arrogant super-intelligent races are always doomed, just like the Furlings.

BTW, I absolutely love Vala. (A) She wears that crazy eye mask while she sleeps. (B) She brought a hair dryer on the mission. Where was she going to plug that in?

I ran home for lunch today (leftover Nachos, yum!) and in my mail was the new Entertainment Weekly with the cast of Battlestar Galactica on the cover. Now, EW is a old and new thing for me. I subscribed years ago, just out of college I think, for the first time. I had it for years. When I sold the last house and said goodbye to the old Daniel (the one Ted calls, "Shopping Bag Daniel") I cancelled this and all my other magazine subscriptions. A month or so ago they sent me one of those "we really want you back" offers: one year for $10. OK, they got me back and I'm glad to be back. So as I said, this week they have Battlestar Galactica on the cover and a great story with no spoilers, just glimpses. The starts of season three is TWO weeks away. I thought it would never get here. They gush over the show, just like all the critics. I wish NBC would re-run the episodes on Saturday night. They just run reruns of Law & Order and other shows on that night anyway. I wonder what kind of ratings it would get?

BTW, tonight is the mid-season finales of Stargate: SG1 and Stargate: Atlantis.

I occasionly use a few terms which I've either made up or are not very common. Here's my diffinitive list:

• Brands Off: A show that doesn't use product placement. More specifically a reality show which doesn't. Opposite: Brands On.
• Sandbagging: When you save up a show on your TiVo (or old video tapes) and then gorge on a huge number of episodes at the same time. I'm currently doing that with Eureka, Vanished, and Boston Legal.
• PTT: a moment on television which is so funny you miss the following dialog because you are laughing so hard. You must Pause The TiVo untill you complete your gaffawing. Most responsible for this was Arrested Development. OR, something shocking happens such that you must PTT until you regain composure. "Oh, no! They didn't just do that!" Example: LOST or Battlestar Galactica.
• SitCom Embarrasement Syndrome: When one empathizes so much with the characters plight in their own stupid situation they put themselves in, you can't keep watching. Classic example: I Love Lucy. Currnet Example: The Office.

Jericho started last night. I think it's got great potential but this particular episode wasn't the best. The townsfolk going all moblike was so predictable. And you'd never guess that there was one or more escaped criminals on the loose. Also, how did Jake know there was an empty crashed prison bus. I'm already sick of Major Dad's motivational speeches. I want a genetically enhanced shark to eat him. However, there's a lot of potential and some great mysteries. What caused the bombing? Why hasn't anyone heard from the neighboring towns or Wichita? Who is the mysterious black guy who knows how to get things done? Was he off the prison bus? What was Jake doing in the last five years? What was he going to do with his inherience? Did the love interest's finance survive? How will the town survive? I look forward to future episodes.>

Episode 2 of Survivor 13 was just on. The most memorable moment is "love at first sight." And Im not talking about Billy's bizarre love for Candice. I'm talking about my love for JP (pictured). Usually I'm not at all attracted to Latinos. But there's no way I would let this guy get away. He is smoking hot. I'm torn on the idea of purposefully throwing the challenge. It was good to do it at this early stage of the game. However it was still a crappy move and it made Anna-Lucia mad. And you don't want to piss of Anna-Lucia. Anyway, it worked and strange Metal guy Billy was booted. I don't miss him. All the fatties are gone now.

Also, I was reading the DISH Network description of the episode. It said, "Another castaway is sent home." Duh! That's happened in every single episode every. That's like saying "This show includes a laugh track," on an episode of Friends.

Earl is back for season 2. This is a great show because it has funny characters doing crazy things. And Earl has a reason to do crazy things. I'm also happy about the great cast of recurring characters. I think the show should go on the "list" premise for three seasons then just be about these crazy people we've come to love. What would Earl do without his list? Would he return to his old ways? And how long can he and his brother live on $100K anyway?

A new show starts tonight, Jericho. It uses the "prodigal son" idea. Skeet Ulrich returns to his home town of Jericho for a short visit. Unfortunately while he's there, the rest of the world blows up. The town is now isolated and must make it on their own. But what secret is Skeet hiding? Who else is survived the nukes? What caused the nukes? Was it those frakin' toasters?

Last week's premier of Survivor had the slightest number of fewer viewers than last season's debut but of course the news reports only point out it's the least number of viewers since the start of the series. How many lower would it have been without the gimmick of racially split teams? I guess we'll find out next season. But on the debut of The Amazing Race, the two most diverse teams both got the boot in the first leg of the race. Coincidence, or is CBS just too white for the rest of the country? I say: coincidence. Let's hope Team Stumpy gets sent home next week.

Tonight is the return of Boston Public on ABC. I stopped watching lawyer shows in the 90's but this one I love. It's consistently funny with very well written stories and fantastic actors. Kirk, Odo, and Murphy Brown are great as the senior partners. This season Alex P. Keaton returns as a recurring character and love interest for the blonde lawyer. His character is terminally ill and left last season to die in Europe or something. Also, Parker Posey is back for at least tonight. I wish she would join as a regular cast member. She is wickedly funny as the evil lawyer in the firm.

So any new procedural show is just off the list. These people looked at an overblotted landscape of cop and lawyer shows and said "Me too!" There are other shows I won't be watching and here is why:

'Til Death - This is the show that makes me happy I'm gay. The entire joke is about how crappy it is to be married for a long time. My parents are happy. I love Jolie Fisher, though.
Men in Trees - Anne Heche is crazy and this terrible rip off of Northern Exposure is sure to be the first show cancelled. I wonder if ABC picked this up just so they would have something to cancel.

• The Class - I don't even remember anyone from my third grade class and why would I have a reason to reunite with them? What an odd premise.
• Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip - This is most likely to go the way of An American President. It will have great initial ratings but as viewers realize they can't relate to conflict between producers, writers, actors and the network they will quickly tune out. This will be cancelled in March or April.
• Smith - Is that the one with James Woods or Ray Liota? Either way a show with the only asset being a movie star is destined to fail.
• Kidnapped - If this gets picked up for a second season, I'll watch season one next summer via NetFlix.
• Six Degrees - The show about strangers meeting coincidentally has very low appeal to me. Perhaps I'll NetFlix this as well.
• Shark - See Smith
• Brothers & Sisters - Night time soaps about families are only interesting when there are huge empires or dynasties involved. Plus Calista Flockhart frightens me.
• Runaway - I'm already watching Prisonbreak, I don't need another "on the run" show.
• Help Me Help You - Ted Danson is old and stupid.
• Ugly Betty - 'cause she's ugly.
• The Game - I didn't watch Girlsfriends so I don't need to watch its spin-off.
• Friday Night Lights - How much stories can you have about teens being yelled at by their coach? And what if we like the characters? Will this show follow them to college? Those games aren't on Friday night.
• Notes from the Underbelly - I don't even remember reading about this in the TV Guide or Entertainment Weekly.

Here's a list of the shows I plan on watching this fall, even if only the pilot.

• Vanished - This started four weeks ago and I'm currently sandbagging it on TiVo. It's not getting good reviews so I may flush it before the baseball break.
• Happy Hour - It not likely to stick around, but it's a fun sitcom about a bunch of friends and co-workers who like to drink a lot.
• Jericho - The only town to survive a nuclear holocast. I'm intrigued.
• The Nine - My #1 pick for the fall. I love ensemble casts with mysteries. Debuts after Lost and should keep a good following. I'm sad that Audrey from 24 is on it which means she won't be back as Jack's love interest for a third season.
• Heroes - It's like the X-men but not at all different. SciFi never lasts on NBC so enjoy the ride and hope for a full season.
• Big Day - It's a comedy with the whole season about one wedding day. I'm watching it for Wendy Malick from Just Shoot Me. She is too funny.
• 30 Rock - NBC comedy about SNL. Tina Fey is a brilliant comedy writter and Alec Baldwin was perfect on Will & Grace so this has lots of funny potential.
• 20 Good Years - Jeffrey Tambor and John Lithgow? I'm there!
• The Knights of Prosperity - Originally titled "Let's Rob Mick Jager" and then just "Let's Rob...". I'm hoping the second season they go after Kathy Griffin. "No Pom-Pom!"

And these are old shows I'm starting up this season.

• Survivor: Cook Islands - Let the racism begin!
• New Adventures of Old Christine - Julia won the Emmy and she was always my favorite Seinfeld actor. I loved her when she was no one on Day by Day. Her guest spots on Arrested Development were some of the funniest scenes on television.

Survivor #1 started in the summer of 1999. It was a game show unlike anything we had seen before and I gathered with my coworkers every Wednesday to watch it. Now the original winner Richard Hatch is on his way to jail for tax evasion. I've met him in person and he's a bit of a retard. I started watching Season 2 and I was just not impressed. It was as though they were using the techniques and tricks perfected in season one. The drama was boring and I didn't even watch the 2 hour finale. Since then I've neglected the show. This season I'm going to pick it up again because they are having four teams instead of two and the team will be divided along racial lines. There's the black team (like the Black family from the Amazing Race: Family Edition), the Asian team, the Latino/a team, and the cracker team. Now we get to see who is the master race after all.

What they really need to do is have four teams like this: straight men, straight women, gay men, and gay women. And then do things way unexpected like getting big, strong, jock gay men, small nerdy straight men, hot femmy lesbians with big boobs, and butch looking straight women.

And I love YouTube.com. This week Jon Stewart had one of the funniest Bush parodies ever. I found it on YouTube and you can watch it here.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-rBc9jxG1U



If you hadn't seen the original Geico commercial, which is very funny itself, go here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Em-b0wQzQ-0

Oh The Runway was good this week. First was the return of Angela and Vincent. Watching Jeffrey freak out at the return of Angela was fabulous. He is such a dick. Of course this means he will probably win. Laura almost broke down in teas several times. Pregnant women are useless. I did like her dress but not enough to win. I'm glad she did since she did exactly what the judges wanted: younger and hipper. Once again I liked Kayne's dress more than Jeffrey's or Uli's, but it was his turn to go. Sean and I decided that today over lunch at Acapulco Fresh.

***Warning LOST spoilers***

There's this new video on YouTube with some asstounding information about the Hanso Foundation and The Dharma Inititive, the two fictional entities behind the mysterious island on LOST.



I'm not sure if these are from the creators or if it is fan fiction, but it's really cool either way. I had read there was going to be new content released on the web this summer, so this might be parts of it.

For some reason there are lots of new shows this fall with similar premises. This happens now and then and usually only one, if either, makes it to a second season. Here's my take on this years double-mint shows:

Behind the Scenes of Television: Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip vs. 30 Rock
Both have numbers in their names, both are about the behind the scenes shenanigans/drama of a SNL type show, and both are on the same network. My vote is on the Tina Frey comedy although shows about "the industry" never do well so don't get attached to either.

Kidnapped vs. Vanished
Both are about high profile missing persons cases and both are not what they seem to be. I would wait to see if there's a season two for either and then watch season 1 on DVD next summer. In other words, don't get too attached to either.

Football Mania!: The Game vs. Friday Night Lights
The Game is a sitcom on The CW about pro football players and their wives while Friday Night Lights is an NBC drama about high school football. The Game has the best chance of making it, since there is still comedy to be derived from this premise after the Super Bowl.

Hostage situation: The Nine vs. Standoff
The Nine is about a group who were held in a bank standoff for more than two days while Standoff is about the team that negociates such standoffs. Are there that many standoffs a year that there can be 22 different episodes about this team of specialists? The Nine is the winner here.

Den of Thieves: Smith vs. The Knights of Prosperity
In the third of drama/sitcom premises, Smith is about a crack team who pulls of elaborate heists while The Knights of Prosperity is about a bumbling team who try to pull of heists. Maybe there's room for both.

Yesterday I got my copy of LOST Season 2. Now I can re-watch the entire season before the debut of season 3 on October 4th. Season 2 was all about the hatch that was blown open at the end of Season 1. Locke became obsessed with the button. Jack became obsessed with controlling people. Charlie became obsessed with saving baby Claire. And Hurley became obsessed with all the food they discovered. By the end of the season, three main characters were shot dead, all women. We know the island is a bit more than just the regular South Pacific paradise. We also know was Kate did to become a fugitive and what sent Hurley to the nut house. Here are the mysteries about the island that we don't know the answer to yet:

• What is the smoke creature? Does it look the same to everyone?
• How does the island heal people?
• Why do people on the island get "vision dreams"?
• What is the strange electromagnetic behavior around the hatch?
• What are the other hatches used for?
• Why can't people leave the vicinity of the island except through one course?
• What's the deal with the four toed foot statue?
• How many people on the outside know about the island?

Breaking news from last week: Donald Trump has fired Carolyn Kepcher. It was already announced that she was not going to be in the next season of The Apprentice. This could be explained since the next season is set in L.A. and Carolyn's day job is, or was, running a country club in the NY area. But now she is out of Donald's organization forever. Good luck Carolyn!

Season 4 of Nip/Tuck starts tonight on FX. There was no real season finale like last year. The storyline was wrapped up. Here's what happened. Christian and Julian continued to battle with "the Carver," a serial rapist/torturer who has attacked both Christian and Julian in the 2nd season. The Carver kidnap Christian's fiance on their wedding day and reversed all of her surgeries. Very gross. They ultimately figured out the Carver was actually two people, both close to them. One was their bisexual surgeon employee Quentin and the other was his sister Kit who was the detective investigating the case. I think the better solution would have been Julian's unknown rapist father. Quentin and Kit got away and fled to some sunny Mediterranean city. Meanwhile, Matt the teenage was taken prisoner by his crazy ex's racist father and almost killed. He and his tranny friend broke free an killed him, burying him in the grave he made them dig for themselves. It was kind of a crazy season. I wonder what this season has in store. I'm sure I'll be watching the horrible surgury scenes with my eyes covered.